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Satire Since 1993

Exclusive to the

World Headline News

April 15, 2020   •   Issue 129   (In Honor of American Tax Day)

The Buck Stops Here


"... But Not the Blame... ...It Was Obama's Fault!"

"Only I have the BRAINS* to know when America is safe!"

Almost Washington State (WHN) April 15, 2020. President Harry Truman, 33rd President of the United States, was renowned for the famous sign on his desk reading “The Buck Stops Here!” Per Mr. Truman, the sign signified that, "As President, I am the person solely responsible for my governments decisions and actions - good or bad." But the naivety of 1953 is, according to current the current occupant of the White House, not a responsible attitude in 2020 as the definition of "responsibility" has devolved. Per Mr. Trump, "I don't take responsibility at all... If things are bad, it has to have been Obama's fault, or Mexico's fault, or China's fault, or the World Health Organizations fault.... but clearly NOT my fault. Everything I do is, as you know, PERFECT! Of course, now it may also be Fauci's fault - I'm kind of on the fence about him... #FireFauci...."

But Mr. Trump does love some aspects of the 1950s; for example, the right to openly discriminate against minorities.  While not normally a fan of Democratic Presidents, there is ONE aspects of Mr. Truman that Mr. Trump greatly admires, "I loved his desk plaque... 'the buck stops here'... I mean how convenient is that - Stevey personally delivers the money to me every April 15th! Springtime is the best, its when a young man, like me, fancy turns to the lawns, well putting greens at least, and bank accounts, turning green! I like to call Stevey, Steven Mnuchin my personal Secretary of the Treasury, my Mr. Green Jeans - cause he brings me lots of green!" an elated President tRUMP stated.

WHN EXCLUSIVE: "The Buck Stops Here". In January 1953 Harry Truman stated that Presidents can't "pass the buck' and blame others, but that the 'buck' stops with the President.  Mr. Trump also believes that the 'buck stops with the President' as shown by a recent WHN Exclusive photo. However, responsibility for most things presidential are other peoples fault - "I don't take responsibility at all." (March 13, 2020). World Headline News © 2020 Ned Ander-Thal.

It's All in the Interpretation of "HOW" The Buck Stops

* Rumor has it, though he won't show proof, that President tRUMP graduated from the 2nd grade.


Despite repeated calls by Mr. Trump's for then President Obama to release his Harvard transcripts (and implying that Obama only made it into Harvard as a 'minority') tRUMP has threatened to sue any institution (Wharton Business School, New York Military Academy) that released his transcripts.  Mr. tRUMPS claims of graduating at the top of his class at Wharton are clearly false as the Wharton students graduating with Honors were publicly acknowledged at the time of graduation.  Mr. Trump was, according to many classmates and faculty, average at best.

"I thought SECOND GRADE was 'Secondary School'..."

Donald tRUMP

WHN EXCLUSIVE: "The Buck Stops Here". Steven 'Mr. Green Jeans' Mnuchin delivers the greenery to Mr. tRUMP early on April 15, 2020. Secretary of the Interior 'Mr. Moose' and GOP Party Secretary Dancing Beer, er, Bear look on as tRUMP appraises the pile; "Could be a bit BIGGER Mr. Green Jeans - maybe more manure...". World Headline News © 2020 Ned Ander-Thal.

Trump Declares HE Is Captain Of The Ship


"Relax, stupidity produces antibodies"

Susie Derkins,

Calvin & Hobbes, 1990


Trump Announces End of Covfefe-19, er, Coronavirus Production. Aides are afraid to tell him he ordered Mexico to end Corona BEER production, not the coronavirus...

Covfefe-19 The Beer of tRUMP

"When Somebody Is President Of The United States, Your Authority is TOTAL!"

Actual Quote: April 13, 2020

Captain/President Bligh:

"They [crew/Americans] respect but one law - 'the law of fear'... I expect you to carry out whatever orders I give, whenever I give them. The ship's company will remember that I am

your captain, your judge, and your jury."

WHN: But Mr. tRUMP, even a casual viewing of the movie suggests that Captain Bligh was both ruthless and cruel! TRUMP: "Yea, I know, great huh!?"


Trump must have an exceptional immune system!