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Satire Since 1993

May 20, 2020   •   Issue 131



The Worst Crimes Ever

In a WHN EXCLUSIVE, President Trump outlines his evidence of former President Obama's crimes. Shocking many observers, Mr. Trump provided photo-documentary evidence to the WHN of the OBAMAGATE crimes. World Headline News © 2020 Ned Ander-Thal.


As Sworn To By

Donald J. Trump

My fellow Americans, and some of you 'legal' foreign people, as my Administration's Coronavirus efforts wind down, I want to tell you about our spectacular results. WE'RE #1! With only 1.4, er, 1.6 million, 1.7?, Americans infected and a mere 15, no 1,000, er, 80,000, no 90,000, deaths I can claim mission accomplished. Nobody has bigger numbers than me, I am so proud of what my Administration has done to the American public.

But it is now time to get America back to my business - specifically focusing on my conspiracy theories. I have uncovered a truly devious plot to make me look foolish and incompetent. This 'deep state' plot was hatched by the known terrorist 'Barack Obama' who I sometimes call 'The Supreme Evil-Doer' or 'Not-My-Fault'. This 'deep state' plot is called OBAMAGATE and is deviously simple in that all it requires is for me to continue to talk. OBAMAGATE is the most heinous criminal conspiracy ever... because it makes me look foolish and incompetent. Despite denials from some, I'm looking at you Shifty Schiff, my trusted attorney Rudy Giuliani and I have uncovered actual photo-documentary evidence of OBAMAGATE. Many people, by that I mean mostly Jared and Ivanka, say the the photos are damming and incontrovertible evidence of Mr. Obama's treason. I leave it to the wise readers of the WHN to view the evidence and my sworn statements regarding these damming photos. God Bless Trump 'Americafafa'...


by Ned Ander-Thal, noted Psycho, er, Psyco-ologist...

To help the readers of the WHN understand Trump's psychology and behavior, the reader should conceptualize


Cats and Trump ONLY appreciates a person in the context of what that person can do for them at that immediate moment in time; past and future don't exist. Both can be friendly one moment and then maul you the next moment

- while still expecting you to feed and praise them.

TRUMP'S MOTTO: Feed me, scratch me, clean my litter box, and then let me maul you....

What's REALLY Behind












"Hide your children, bar(r) your doors, cancel the election!"

William P. Barr To Celebrates Birthday • May 23, 1950

DOJ TO Sue Barr 'TWIN' And Accomplices Who Stole Birthday Cake!


Guest Columnist to the WHN; May 20, 2020.

Obama made me go bankrupt in 1991, 2004 and 2009!

In the 1990s, along with my highly successful New Jersey Casinos, I had a profitable auto-parts store. Then, as seen in this security camera photo, Obama looted my shop. My security guard almost caught him, but Obama is fast...

Consequent to the theft of my large inventory of uninsured wiper blades, it drove my entire empire into bankruptcy.

Good things the Russians bailed me out or I might never have become President.

Obama was behind the 1981 assassination attempt on Reagan

As a secret advisor to Ronny, those in the know called us Ronny and Donny, I was there when Obama shot Ronny. I would have tackled him then and there, but my bone-spurs were particularly troublesome that day.... I did however capture a photo of him with my trusty Kodak 110 Instamatic pocket camera. As you can see, the fleet footed felon was clearly running away from the crime scene, while I, despite my painful bone spurs waddled to the nearest KFC.

Obama's A Park Avenue Arsonist!

Obama torched my favorite car - a 'cherry' 1955 BMW Isetta! The car was great, i could just open the front of the car and sit down like I would on the toilet... I would have restored the burned out hulk, but he had already destroyed my once profitable auto-parts store. I did, however, score some T.P. from Obama's partner. She wasn't all that fast....

'Alienation of Affection'

Sure, I'm on my THIRD wife and something like my 45th (hehe!) mistress. But that doesn't mean that Obama should 'screw' with my love-life. I mean, I SAW Obama pay Stormy Daniels $130,000 to blow me off - and not in the same way that I paid her $130,000 for...

Barr doesn’t expect Obama or Biden will be investigated in newly announced DOJ review of 2016 Russia probe... but their involvement in the theft of his birthday cake by 'Hungry-Hungry Hippo' will be!

Fortunately, Michael Flynn is innocent ...

despite voluntarily pleading guilty twice ...

Obama's Real Crime!?!

Of Being President While


Obama's To BLAME!

EVERYTHING bad that has happened since November 2016 is Obama's fault. He impersonated me on my phone call to the Ukraine, but worse of all, he engineered the Coronavirus with the Chinese to destroy my Presidency.  But I've shown him, he didn't destroy my Presidency, I DID!

My authority is total … responsibility is zero....

The 'Evidence' Speaks For Itself:


Recently some readers of the WHN took issue with our "Buck Stops Here" exposé. In response to these concerns, we have recently captured a new photo of Mr. tRumps desk noting that the Truman desk sign has been replaced by the tRump desk sign: "THE MUCK STARTS HERE!"

While William Barr

Turns 70:

"American Justice Turns In Its Grave"

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