Ned Ander-Thal's World Headline News

Use the PULLDOWN MENUS below for navigation:

Editor Ned Ander-Thal

Satire Since

1993

Justice... 1984, maybe 1650, Style

The REMAKING of AMERICAN 'JUSTICE'

'DOLLAR CO$T AVERAGING' Is In,

'TRUTH, JUSTICE AND THE AMERICAN WAY' Is Out'

August 7, 2025   •   Issue 203 (of 250)

Almost Washington State (WHN) August 7, 2025. "While Justice is usually expensive, it can also be profitable!" President Trump stated to an assembly of families with members convicted of brazen, and lucrative, crimes. Trump continued: "Success in any endeavor deserves rewards... for both you and I. Today I announce the 'TRUMP GOLD CARD' for white-collar criminals.  For a minimum donation of $1,000,000 to your favorite President, an unfairly convicted relative can receive consideration for this highly coveted 'get out of jail' commutation / pardon card... for $5,000,000 you will almost surely get FULL consideration... and a full pardon.  By using this unique 'dollar cost averaging' of justice, I can be assured of getting the most out of the Justice Department."

World Headline News

EXCLUSIVES

NOTICE: Beginning 2025 the World Headline News will be transitioning our main web address to www.thewhn.com.  However, www.thewhn.ca will also remain live for the foreseeable future.

WHN EXCLUSIVE: "PAY TO PLAY!" is the new motto of the Trump Administration.  Want Immigration, buy Trump's $5 Million Trump Card; want perverted JUSTICE for a loved one, pay $1+ million to attend a Trump dinner at Mar-a-Lago.  As they say, "You get what you pay for!".  © 2025 Ned Ander-Thal, World Headline News

ACTUAL QUERY: Tell me about "www.thewhn.ca"

WHN EXCLUSIVE: PRINT ME! and receive SPECIAL TREATMENT upon entry into the USA.  WARNING: use of this card constitutes a legally binding debt  in the sum of $5 Million payable to Donald J. Trump.  Failure to pay said debt to WILL result in an immediate deportation to a third party county personally selected by Mr. Trump.  Top deportation locations currently include a super-max prison in El Salvador, random street corners in Sudan, the Russian army, or, worse of all, a Democrat led city in California.   © 2025 Ned Ander-Thal, World Headline News

NEW FEATURE

What Does AI ChatGTP

Say About the WHN?

10 EASY STEPS TO BECOMING A

REAL BILLIONAIRE!

By: Donald J. Trump

GUEST EDITORIAL & GIFT

Orwell's "1984" Has Arrived:

“ALL BRANCHES OF GOVERNMENT ARE EQUAL,

But Some Are More Equal Than Others

Almost Washington State (WHN) August 7, 2025. With the coronation of Donald Trump, Executive Orders have been flying out of the Oval Office - many of which have faced immediate challenges within the Federal Courts. Of interest, lower Federal Courts and Appeal Courts have often ruled that Trump's Executive Orders are unconstitutional and/or violate the separation of power in that he is usurping power delegated to either Congress or the court.  Trump then appeals to, as he repeated states, HIS Supreme Court.  

And it appears that it is indeed HIS court.  Of note Trump did appoint 3 of the 9 judges in his first term who almost always side with Trump in the courts rulings.  In addition Clarence Thomas, whose wife Ginni Thomas actively supports far right causes and was very active in the efforts to overturn the 2020 election as well as supported the January 6 insurrectionist, is a reliable ally of the President.  Samuel Alito, architect of the overturning of Roe v Wade (right to Abortion) is a firm believer in 1650-era English Common Law and the need for a powerful, unhindered, Chief Executive.  Chief Justice Roberts, a staunch conservative, is as very favorable towards ultra-conservative rulings and Trump's efforts [see sidebar below].  

Importantly, the court is enabling drastic changes to the American society WITHOUT ACTUALLY MAKING PRECEDENT SETTING RULINGS. The court, by a consistent 6-3 majority, has allowed Trump to run roughshod over the Federal government and the constitutionally enshrined separation of powers. How is this being done?  The Supreme Court simply rules (6-3) that: A) the lower court injunctions were improperly issued; B) the party filing the lawsuit had no standing (i.e., were not directly party/affected by the action); C) the lower court judged errored in some manner thus sending the case back to the lower court; D) only Congress can address the issue by either legislation or impeachment.  The Supreme Court then states that, as CHIEF EXECUTIVE, Trump can proceed as he wishes while the cited error/etc are resolved appropriately.  Importantly, the Supreme Court has actually never issued ruling as to the constitutionality of most of Trump's contentious Executive Orders.  Hence, if a FUTURE Democratic President should assert the same claim to power as Trump, this same court could easily rule against the liberal Presidents actions.

PROTO-POLICE STATE?

Almost Washington State (WHN) August 7, 2025. Never one to rest on his laurels, Trump continues the assault, er, transformation, of American government by targeting the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA).  Per Mr. Trump: "I'm a genius, the changes my minion Lee Zeldin will make at the EPA will save the government BILLONS, perhaps TRILLIONS, of dollars in just rebranding costs alone.  We get to keep all the letterhead, decals and collector pins that say EPA, but the mission of the deep state agency has been corrected.  It will stay the EPA, but will focus on improving environmental pollution because that is a sign that factories and the economy is booming.  Plus, my golf courses will be greener and insect free because I can use all the chemical fertilizers and insecticides I want!  Lee Zeldin will make sure  that AMERICA IS NUMBER ONE in emissions.  I know I'm doing my part after the 6 Taco Bell bean burritos and 4 Diet Cokes I had for my 2 pm snack."

The EPA was created was established in 1970 via, ironically, an Executive Order by a Republican President (Richard Nixon). In contrast to Trump, Nixon's Executive Order was then ratified by committee hearings in the House and Senate.  The mission of the EPA was to both regulate the emission/release of toxic agents into the environment and to protect human health by assuring earth, air and water were safe for humans to produced food in, live on and play on.  Environmental impact of major projects by both private and governmental entities had to be assessed prior to any action.  But this did create paperwork and cost money.

In 2025 the mission of the agency has changed under Trump and Lee Zeldin, the EPA Administrator. Zeldin has stated the 'the role of the EPA is to promote business and facilitate the exploitation of America's land, air and water for America'.  To achieve this, Zeldin's new EPA will axe past administration rules that led to regulation of vehicle, airplane and power plant emissions, and gut electric vehicle mandates - all in the name of deregulation.  Zeldin has publicly stated that he does not believe the bulk of environmental studies conducted since the 1960s, but he does trust his, and more importantly Trump's, gut beliefs.  

From Texas to D.C. Trump and Minions Engineer the Demise of the American Rule of Law with the 6-3 consent of the U.S. Supreme Court.

WILL HISTORY DECLARE THE ROBERT'S COURT THE ENEMY OF REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY?

In 2019 Chief Justice John Roberts was the deciding vote in Rucho v. Common Cause, a Supreme Court decision that declared Federal judges could NOT review extreme partisan gerrymandering of constitutional districts to determine if they violated the publics constitutional rights. In essence the ruling stated that the court had NO ROLE in protecting free and fair elections.  This ruling is the key enabler of current efforts by GOP-governed states such as Texas, who are currently redrawing congressional districts with the explicitly stated intentions to actively preclude the ability of the Democratic party to win US House seats within Texas.

In Texas, in the 2024 election Trump received 56% of the vote and won 27 of the 38 congressional districts- even in two that elected Democrats [i.e., 25:13 Republican: Democrat congressional representative].  The explicitly state goal of the SPECIAL SESSION of the Texas legislature is to redraw the congressional districts to dilute the vote of democrats and gain a minimum of 5 more Republican seats in the U.S. House of representatives [i.e., 30:8 distribution; i.e. Republicans would have 79% of the congressional seats]. Other states (e.g., Florida) are also moving towards this goal as well.  This is all thanks to the Roberts Court.  

In some states, this GOP-attack on democracy has already become entrench.  In Wisconsin, historically a bluish state, Republicans in 2016 controlled the state house, senate, governorship and supreme court. They used this time to gerrymander state and congressional districts in an attempt to create a PERMANENT Republican majority.  Thus, while Democrats win state wide races (e.g., U.S. Senate, Governorship, Attorney General, State Supreme Court) they can not win control of the State House or State Senate because of the past gerrymandering - despite the fact that the aggregate vote total for the State House and Senate races favored the Democrats.

Trump Building a UNIFIED DATA BASE on All Americans... and the World

We Know ALL ,and will your information to suit our needs, not yours!

Criticized Trump in Canada/Europe/Asia/etc, NO ENTRY for You!

Trump Administration Bans

Information At Odds With Trump's

'ALTERNATIVE FACTS"

Orders Microsoft to Freeze E-Mail Account of The Hague Prosecutor Investigating Israeli Prime Minister of Gaza War Crimes.

Fires Commissioner of the Bureau of Labor Statistics for Reporting Weak Job Growth

I was born poor.  Unlike all my childhood acquaintances [I never had friends... because they were jealous of my magnificent hair] who were feed exotic foods like Gerber's stained carrots with beautiful plastic Superman spoons, while I was only given pureed McDonald hamburgers using an ugly platinum soup ladle.  I tell you life was rough.  My father Fred was barely scrimping by off a measly 27,000+ rental units in the unknown slums of New York City; you know, places like Queens, Brooklyn and, most embarrassingly, Coney Island.  He didn't own even ONE skyscraper and didn't play golf - can you imagine the embarrassment I suffered at school where other kids taunted me with cries of "Hey Coney Island Donny, what's your handicap... stupidity?".

*FACTUAL NOTE: By many financial analyses, until 2024 Trump would have been substantially wealthier IF he had simply kept his fathers real estate empire instead of venturing into casinos, airlines, golf courses and skyscrapers - all of which he LOST significant money on [see issue 186].  

But this changed in 2024/2025 when other people created entities that put FREE MONEY into Trump's coffers.  Truth Social was created by others and, in exchange for his involvement, he received the vast majority of shares leading to a large 'paper' financial gain.  More importantly, an estimated $3,000,000,000 (~40%) of Trump's wealth is from his cryptocurrency holdings that started in ~December 2024.  The $TRUMP and $MELANIA coin, which cost Trump 'nothing', and were created out of the ether by others, were sold to individuals and nations (e.g., Saudi Arabia, United Arab Emirates, and Qatar) for BILLIONS of dollars - likely for the intent of gaining 'influence' with the White House.   His efforts as President to legitimize cryptocurrency via the U.S. government is clearly self-serving and furthers the sales of his meme-coins. Unlike donations to his multiple Political Action Committees or the Trump Library, purchases of cryptocurrency directly adds to Trump's personal wealth.  While NOT INCLUDED in Trump's personal wealth calculations, 'donations' to the  Trump Library and his Political Action Committees are under his virtually complete financial control and he can spend these funds almost at will.

Some people also claim that I dodged the draft for the Vietnam war.  That simply is not true.  As shown by my photo, I was clearly in the NEW YORK Military ACADEMY - where I served honorably, was highly decorated, and, as many say, VERY BRAVELY ATTACKED the party scene of 1970/1980s New York. The enemy I faced was even more dangerous than the Viet Cong (VC). I battled the dreaded VD. Despite putting myself at risk repeatedly, I was never injured or captured.  I was, as many people state, a true hidden hero of the late 60s, 70s and 80s!

WHN EXCLUSIVE: Young Donald Trump in the trenches of SE Manhattan in the 1970/80s. Per Mr. TRUMP on the Howard Stern Show: "I've been so lucky in terms of that whole world," he said of sexually transmitted diseases. "It is a dangerous world out there.  It's scary, like Vietnam. Sort of like the Vietnam-era.  It is my personal Vietnam. I feel like a great and very brave soldier.'  © 2025 Ned Ander-Thal, World Headline News

Using the G.I. (Generous Inheritance) Plan, I then conquered the Wharton School of Business with the HIGHEST GRADES EVER SEEN... at least that is what my schools will tell you as I have a $40 BILLION lawsuit pending for 'emotional anguish' if they don't.  SO HOW DID I GET SO SUPER RICH?  I used my easy to follow, and copyrighted, 10 STEP PROGAM TO RICHES that I am sharing with you for FREE... because I'm such a great, fabulously wealthy, and handsome (all the girls say so!) guy.

ENVIRONMENTAL IN JUSTICE

Trump Administration Reimagines The

Environmental PROTECTION Agency (EPA)

Creating the Environmental POLLUTION Agency (EPA)

Fascism Lesson #1:

Don't Insult Dear Leader

"Hey, if Santa can spy on you, so can I...."

Almost Washington State (WHN) August 7, 2025. Using FEAR (False Evidence Appearing Real) tactics, the Trump Administration is leading an attack on both democratic institutions (e.g., Judges) and Democrats. Director of National Intelligence Tulsi Gabbard is claiming (using previously discredited [Bipartisan Senate Panel]) claims that Obama/Obama officials manufactured the Russia Hoax that plagued Trump during his first term - despite clear and convincing evidence to the contrary.  Attorney General Pam Bondi is empaneling a Grand Jury to potentially indict Obama era officials.   Additionally, the Department of Justice and FBI have fired virtually all the DOJ lawyers and FBI agents who participated in the investigation of the January 6 insurrection (or as they view it, THE GREAT PATRIOTIC PARADE) as well as the retention of highly classified documents by Mr. Trump following his 2020 defeat. The DOJ has also opened multiple, unfounded, investigation into Democratic members of Congress and citizen activists as well as, so-called, activist judges.  Trump has issued full pardons or commutations of sentence to hundreds of Trump supporters (nearly 1,600 alone for January 6) and financial donors or their family members. Trump in particular does not believe in white-collar crimes - especially crimes related to the falsification of business records to cover up bribes... something he nows about due to his 34 felony convictions in New York.

Most obviously, in just 7 months, the United States is now home to a masked, extraordinarily well-funded, 'secret' police force (Immigration and Custom Enforcement; ICE) that is literally abducting people from the streets, businesses, farms, churches and government offices leaving both non-citizens and citizens in fear.  This is accompanied by an extensive system of prison/deportation camps has been built that lack meaningful oversight or access by elected officials. The "Land of the Free" is no more.

RETRIBUTION!

"Vengeance is mine!" sayeth the 'Lord Trump'

"Judicial"

GETTING PERSONAL ECONOMIC INJUSTICE

RESTORING PROPER INJUSTICE TO ALL

Step 1: Be born RICH!

Step 2: Get daddy to bail you out when you go bankrupt... 6 times.

Step 3: Get a fabulous, and fabulist, TV show where you pretend to be ultra SUCCE$$FUL.

Step 4: Using your TV persona, run for President as a joke, but then WIN!

Step 5: Avoid impeachment.

Step 6: MORE FAME! Mount an insurrection and give your middle finger to the constitution.

Step 7: Avoid impeachment again (this one was super tricky!)

Step 8: Slow the courts down to avoid Federal convictions.

Step 9: Run for President... to avoid jail and for RETRIBUTION.

Step 10: WIN (!!!) and use the power of the office to grift money from TV

networks, cryptocurrency, foreign nations, and Trump memorabilia!

Turning $$$$

Into

$$$*$$

TRUMP'S 10 STEP PROGAM TO RICHES

-sult

WHN EXCLUSIVE [Issue 121]: "On a clear day you can see forever, er, 10-12 feet." Mr. Trump touts the effects of his Administration's environmental protection policies. "I LOVE crisp clear days like today, look at all that beautiful clean coal in the air!  Now, can somebody tell me if it's daytime or nighttime?"  © 2019 Ned Ander-Thal, World Headline News

Hey, they go back to

1993!

The IMPORTANT People

NOTE: The federal budget for ICE is approximately $37-45 BILLION a year - the numbers are a little fuzzy since the required "infrastructure" (i.e., detention/internment/prison/concentration camps) were not included in the official ICE budget. This staggering sum is greater than the annual military budgets of all but 15 countries.  It is also more than the combined budgets of the FBI, DEA (Drug Enforcement Administration), ATF (Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives), Bureau of Prisons, and US Marshals Service. ICE will have more funding than ANY federal law enforcement agency has ever had in history.  Oh, and rich people got huge tax cuts and poor people got cuts in food stamps and Medicaid.  

[Only EAGLE-EYED Observers Can Spot The Difference!]

"Hell, it's not like that environmental crap can kill you...TODAY..."  

In 2010, the BP Deepwater Horizon oil spill devastated the Gulf coast fisheries, sea birds, and costal areas in the largest marine oil spill in history. BP was ultimately fined $2.4 Billion with additional cleanup costs that could be up to $20 Billion.  Trump has targeted the laws behind the fines saying they "hurt business".

Laughing Gull covered in oil sludge (Charlie Riedel/AP).