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Editor Ned Ander-Thal

Satire Since 1993

CAUTION!

Items in the mirror are more frightening than they may appear.

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April

October

August - September

THE (Unfortunate) SEQUEL:

NIGHTMARE ON PENNSYLVANIA AVENUE 2: Vengeance will be Mine!

Trump wins both the popular vote and electoral college! The GOP wins Senate and House and the Supreme Court leans heavily right...

January 8, 2025   •   Issue 196 (of 200?)

Little did the WHN expect that 2024 would unfold  the way it did; despite us having reviewed the bizarre events of 2023 in our in "2023 In The Rear View" review. I mean who would have thought that 2024 would be even more crazy than 2023?  But with Trump dominating the political, national and worldwide news cycle, 2024 proved even more bizarre.

2024 in the Rear View

                  JUST LIKE TIME MAGAZINE,               

TRUMP WAS THE WHN TEFLON FELON MAN OF THE YEAR

Issues 194 - 181

January

February

March

May - June

July

November

December

Issue 181

Issue 184

Issue 185

Issue 186

Issue 187

Issue 188

Issue 189

Issue 190

Issue 191

Issue 192

Issue 194

Issue 182

Issue 183

Issue 193

Almost Washington State (WHN) January 8, 2025.  As we at the WHN reflect on 2024, it turns

out it was truly a MAGA YEAR full of PROMISING HOPES and then... DASHED DREAMS.

Felony convictions and Indictments and ...   ... then the 'miracle' of November 5.

But fortunately we did start the year off by consuming A LOT of Ned's patented "Vision Juice" as the WHN gave it's annual predictions for 2024. Sadly Ned's predictions were only right about 50% (coin toss!) of the time.  He missed in sports (Sorry Maple Leaf fans) and science (too bad for the environment) but was (unfortunately) right in his LEGAL (but only after the Supreme Court ruled that virtually ALL Presidential actions were immune to prosecution) and POLITICAL (Yes, Trump won) predictions.

ELECTION SHOCK!  Trump dodges a bullet... not a legal bullet, but a real, actual, bullet. Following his rise from the dead, well, ok, a crease in the ear, he declares himself the "Chosen One" with God's Mandate to Rule the Earth, er, America.

As SPRING blossomed in the Canadian Southwest (Ha-Ha, Ontario!) Trump's legal argument to his multiple legals woesbecame clear: Presidents must have total immunity.  

Biden should have listened and acted fast to remove Trump's threat to Democracy (Seal Team 6!). Instead 'Slow Joe' focused on our WHN Gardening Section discussing the benefits of snow mulching for better spring flowers and our exposure of the "Myths of Big Botany".

In a shocking decision that would have long lasting consequences, the US Supreme Court agreed to hear Trump's argument that the President must have TOTAL IMMUNITY.  Biden, obviously showing signs of dementia, fails to exercise HIS Presidential Immunity in order to eliminate  Trump and save America.  Will a FUTURE Emperor Trump be so restrained?

The roar of March continued.

'He-Man' Trump enhanced his MAGA macho image and opened the 'He-Man' Mar-a-Lago StrongMan (& Patio Babes) Club with his close pals Putin and Orban!

But it was not all roses. In March, Trump's criminal and civil court cases continued to role on to the delight of many! [But as it turned out, less than a majority]

JUSTICE &

AMERICA WINS

Trump Convicted on 34 Felony Charges. NO WAY America will ever vote for a CONVICTED FELON to be President.

January 2025 Correction:

"That's PRESIDENT FELON"

MAGA BLOCKBUSTER MONTH

US Supreme Court Rules: Presidents Have TOTAL IMMUNITY for ALL (Ill-defined) Presidential Actions (thus creating the Imperial Presidency).  The long held (and obviously foolish) notion that "Nobody, not even the President, is above the law" is destroyed by the ruling. Trump claims this ruling invalidates all criminal and civil lawsuits against him.

The TRUMP-HARRIS DEBATE explodes as Trump exposes Savage Haitian Cat Eating Gangs.  Trump also vows to protect Childless Cat Ladies even if they don't want him to. FoxNews reports that Kamala Harris is devoid of compassion for snickering at Trump's debate claims.

Public generally feels Kamala won the debate, but, simultaneously, Trump DID NOT LOSE the debate.

TRUTH.  DAMNATION IS UPON US!

Well at least according to TRUTH SOCIAL.  Earthquakes and hurricanes strike the USA and the GQP claims it is God's Vengeance against liberal America... though strangely the majority of locations affected are GQP strongholds. God admits he sliced the earthquake and missed Trump's Bedminster Golf Club by 3 miles.

ELECTION SHOCK!

Biden withdraws as the Democrat nominee for President following his debate debacle. Vice President Kamala Harris emerges as the Democrats nominee for President and officially begins campaigning in September.

Racing to the Finish line. Despot loving, proven sexual assaulter, and convicted felon Trump versus career Prosecutor Harris enter the final days of the 2024 US Presidential Election in a race that is, somehow, too close to call.

And the WHN mourns the loss of 'Cocky The Cockroach', beloved mascot of a Tucson, Arizona, hospital. Not since the passing of Old Yeller have we wept so much....

Let's BLOW SH!# Up!

Trump nominates multiple

EXPLOSIVE EXPERTS

for his incoming Administration.

Nervous overseas Americans employ unique strategies to re-enter the USA. This pair of terrorists were offered dinner at Mar-a-Lago!

A Holly Jolly TRUMPIAN Christmas.

Trump's BIG BALLS were one of the most sought after presents in 2024.  

While Trumpus brought presents for AMERICANS both NAUGHTY and NICE!

Too bad about the NICE!

MAGA BLOCKBUSTER MONTH

The FIRST BIDEN-TRUMP Debate is held. But, as it turned out it was also the LAST BIDEN-TRUMP Debate as a slow and often confused BIDEN demolished his election chances. This occurred despite the many false and, in some cases, demented statements of TRUMP ("They're eating or Dogs, They're eating our cats").

High Power

Campaign Kicks Off!

2024 In The Rear View

Click on the Issue Number to revisit the issue in a new window!

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Almost Washington State (WHN) January 8, 2025. It is that time of year when the WHN asks, nay begs, it's subscribers FINALLY pay their annual subscription fee.  This year, in addition to receiving our EXCLUSIVE REPORTS, we are awarding our PAID subscribes with a LIMITED ADDITION WHN KEYCHAIN!

The WHN Keychains are painstakingly HANDCRAFTED by New Albania refugees (mostly because it's cheaper than buying them from China) in Almost Washington State (USA!, USA!, USA!) with the 'finest' (i.e., cheapest) material we could find.  The WHN Keychain is sure to become one of your most cherished possessions and an heirloom to pass on to your favorite descendant!  

Limited numbers are available, so be sure to pay your annual subscription by February 12, 2025... the MOST HOLY OF HOLY DAYS (Obviously, it goes with out saying, this is Charles Darwin's Birthday).  Sadly, due to the INCREASED COST of publication quality electrons (and Ned's increased alcohol consumption due to Trump's win), there is slight increase over last year's $0.02 annual subscription fee.  

But trust Ned, the WHN remains a REAL STEAL!*

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TO PAY: As an added convenience to our subscribers, the World Headline News has prepared a partially completed bank draft that you only need 5 MINUTES to complete. Please drag the below bank draft to your desktop, fill in the required information (PLEASE WRITE LEGIBLY! Piña Coladas ain't free!), check the anti-extortion box, sign it with your LEGAL name and  send the completed check, via email, to Ned.  That's it - you're good for another year.... or until Ned dies of alcohol poisoning, is extradited from his warm tropical hideaway to the USA and put in prison [so maybe 2-3 months], or maybe Issue 200 (?).

NOTICE: Beginning in 2025, the World Headline News will be transitioning our main address to the www.thewhn.com.  However, www.thewhn.ca will also remain live for the foreseeable future.

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Year of the TRUMP

"Hindsight" is

The BEST Sight