137 Days In  ... GULP, Don't Worry, Be Happy?

Only 1,324 Days Remain In

Trump's (FINAL?) Term

"I mean, how could it possibly get any [better/worse]?"

June 6, 2025   •   Issue 202 (of 250)

WHN EXCLUSIVE: Ah, MEMORIES...

© 2025 Ned Ander-Thal, World Headline News

NOTICE: Beginning January 1, 2025 the World Headline News will be transitioning our main web address to www.thewhn.com.  However, www.thewhn.ca will also remain live for the foreseeable future.

Almost Washington State (WHN) June 6, 2025.  Today, White House Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt told America that it was time to celebrate: "It's truly Party-Time! The Republicans are partying because 'we' have passed the 'One Big Beautiful Budget Bill' that will bring wealth and prosperity back to America's millionaires and billionaires - you know, the people that count... even the Harvard educated ones - remember, in Trump's America 2+2=5! Our Dear Leader Trump has truly brought America to it's knees - obviously to thank him and kiss his ring.  Indeed, our agenda of F.E.A.R [EDITOR: False Evidence Appearing Real] is working magnificently! Corporations, law firms, education, the 'free-ish' press, health, and best of all, the cryptocurrency [EDITOR: but not Stock] market have never been better as proven by Elon Musk's DOGE [Department Of Greedy Entrepreneurs] audit of 'our' data."

Despite the 'TRUTH' being spread by the White House, with the U.S.A. only 137 days into Trump's second term, nostalgia for "The Good Old Days" is already hitting a fever pitch within the general public.  Not surprisingly, what constitutes "The Good Old Days" varies considerably based on your political ideology.  

For some, such as Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem, "The Good Old Days" means either February 19, 1942 [when Executive Order 9066 was issued which authorized the forced removal and internment of Japanese Americans in World War II] or 3 days after some future random day's 2 a.m. Trump 'Truth' announcing his upcoming "Everybody Who I Don't Like" Executive Order authorizing the interment of... well, you, you and Ned.  Others within Trump's orbit, such as Senator Lindsey Graham (R-SC), wistfully remember the past days of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" [1993-2011:  an era when, while 'officially prohibited, gays, lesbians, and bisexual individuals could serve in the U.S. armed forces as the military could not "ASK" what your sexual orientation was and, as long as you did not "TELL" them, a person was "NORMAL"...].  Per Senator Graham, "I will tell you that 1993-2011 was the era of truly grand closets!  In my South Carolina mansion I had a beautiful Las Vegas-inspired closet designed by Liberace! ... and nobody asked and I didn't tell especially since my 1995 election.  Just a little secret between us boys.  I actually had the Liberace closet installed in 1976 when I turned 21 so I've lived happily in that closet for many years. Though lately it is starting show it's age as some people are openly talking about my closet life."  

"Just like I swore to uphold the constitution, I swear the above is a real photo of me...!"

WHN EXCLUSIVE: Accomplishments obtained via the White House Wire [a REAL White House website that 'trumps' Trump's accomplishments]. Mr. Trump's photo was reportedly taken by the Secretary of Homeland Security Kristi Noem. Per Secretary Noem, "He is such a 'He-Man'. It's good to have a Barbarian back in the White House.  I think the last Barbarian was Herbert Hoover in 1929 and look at what he did to the country and Wall Street with his tariffs!" © 2025 Ned Ander-Thal, World Headline News.

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As Joe Biden likes to say: "Here's the deal!"

As can be OBVIOUSLY observed, NO INTELLIGENCE (Artificial or Otherwise) is used during the capturing of our exclusive World Headline News photos. All photos are individually HANDCRAFTED by an Albanian refugee in Almost Washington State using RECYCLED electrons obtained from potentially 'legal'-ish sources to EXPOSE the 'raw' truth.  While bribes, and the much less common subscription fee, are gladly accepted, these ill-gotten gains

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"I need the kind of generals that

Hitler had!"

Trump Quote per Gen. (Ret.) John Kelly and at least two other eye-witnesses.

Alas, 2023 was

SO LONG AGO...

Hell, we'd even take

2017-2019 over 2025...

Steal, er, Buy, Movie DVD

ADD leftover letters from past RANSOM, er, LOVE notes

THE ART OF THE

'Eve and Adam - Before The Loss of Innocence'

by Ned Ander-Thal  • ©2025

This Months EXCLUSIVE Cover Photo

Perhaps unsurprisingly, when dreaming of "The Good Old Days" the majority of non-MAGA Americans are longingly looking backwards, not forwards (well, maybe AFTER the 2028 election... provided it occurs).  Senator Bernie Sanders (R-VT) stated, "Ah, 2015.... I was riding high in the polls, young people loved me, and I thought I had a real chance at the Democratic Party nomination for President... if only that dream came true because I would have mopped the floor with Trump in the 2016 election."  However, in contrast to Bernie,  a significant number of the non-MAGA fold simply harken back to 2023.  Covid was on the wane, the stock market was rising spectacularly (26.3%; followed by 25.0% in 2024), Biden had restored relations with America's traditional allies, environmental protections were strengthened and the "RULE OF LAW" seemed strong.

The backward looking sentiment was even stronger among some Europeans.  One unnamed European statesman stated, "Despite the hardships of 2022 faced by my country, you know, Russians on every street corner, we could count on our American friends for help.  Today, fat chance... I mean the Fat guy - is he taking the 'fat shot' - in the White House won't give us a chance to fight off the Russian invaders.  In fact, he's taking our mineral resources... and still handing over a third of our country to his best buddy Vlad."

Almost Washington State (WHN) June 6, 2025. Looks like the Ned slightly missed on the timeline... it's been just over a hundred days(!) instead of a few decades. But, sadly, Ned's Prediction appears to be coming true. The NEW (MAGA) Republican party seems fully prepared to hand Trump Dictatorial powers ("I mean who are we to question the President" is a generic GOP Congressional response.).  Meanwhile, while the lower courts seem inclined to enforce laws and the constitution, the Supreme Court with a solid, and very conservative, majority has exhibited mixed rulings on Trump's agenda, but, on the whole, seems inclined to NOT limit the power of the President.  The Supreme Court also seem fine, at least to date, of allowing the Trump Administration to ACTIVELY IGNORE and NOT ENFORCE existing laws.  Indeed, Trump has told his administration to "Not enforce laws I [Trump] don't like.".  It seems clear that Congress can pass laws, but a President apparently is not obliged to respect the wishes of Congress.  So, clearly "THE RULE OF LAW" is, at the very least, endangered.

ISSUE 202  •  June 2025

"However [political parties] may now and then answer popular ends, they are likely in the course of time and things, to become potent engines, by which cunning, ambitious, and unprincipled men will be enabled to subvert the power of the people and to usurp for themselves the reins of government, destroying afterwards the very engines which have lifted them to unjust dominion."

GEORGE WASHINGTON

FAREWELL ADDRESS  •  SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 17, 1796

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Get OLD

THIRD TERM: "I'm not joking. But it is far too early to think about it."

'Inspiration' Strikes

CAUTION: Don't Run With Scissors!

GLUE

it all together

Then MAGIC Happens

Et voilà...

The WHN first used this quote to warn of Candidate Trump in ISSUE 76

July 22, 2016

Ned Ander-Thal

Professional

FLASHER

If you don't care about ripped parchment, inconvenient laws, nasty people, and especially if you don't want bad things to stick to you (e.g.,  like convictions or mistresses), it's best to use TRUMPGlue©

TRUMPGlue© is rumored to be suing GORILLA GLUE© and demanding $100 BILLION for Trademark Infringement and emotional anguish. Per Mr. Trump: "There is only room for ONE MAGA PRIMATE in America... and it is me, the Mar-a-Lago ORANGE-TAN!"

WHN EXCLUSIVE: In a 'diplomatic coup' Trump has extracted extraordinary sovereign wealth from the Gulf States in his recent Middle East tour.  Mr. Trump boasted" "I made billions more money on my 4 day Arabian tour [May 13-16] than no-longer HOT Taylor Swift in her almost TWO years ERA Tour.  Hell, my new $400 million plane is probably the smallest gift I received - and now the U.S. Government will have to GrIFT ME another ONE TWO BILLION dollars worth of upgrades... things like in-flight refueling, armored plating, armored glass, antimissile defenses, other secret defensive capabilities, and communication equipment - that I get to keep IF I ever leave office. But he best part of the trip is that my publicly disclosed 'gifts'  does not include the sale of my cryptocoin, $Trump, to them - or my real estate deals.  Yep, my 'sovereign wealth' has really increased now that I am King, er, President." Despite the Emoluments Clause (Article 1, Section 9, Clause 8) of the U.S. Constitution, the GQP-led Senate and House seem unbothered by Mr. Trump's use of the Presidency to enrich his personal wealth. Democrats meanwhile seem helpless to stop this 'slow' (?; 137 days does not seem all that 'slow') moving constitutional-ish coup.   © 2025 Ned Ander-Thal, World Headline News.

Almost Washington State (WHN) June 6, 2025. In a new look to American diplomatic efforts, King, er, President Trump's first foreign trip as the 47th President was to the Middle East.  Surprisingly to some, the trip was not focused on PEACE in the Middle East but on INVESTMENTS IN 'AMERICA'... or perhaps more correctly ... an American named Trump.  Like many high schoolers, Mr. Trump has been long focused on "the size of his 'unit'".  This, some say obscene, fixation has was only exacerbated by Stormy Daniels use of the word "micro toadstool".  When question by the AP [About Penises] News, White House Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt stated: "While President Trump is well endowed, he feels that it could be bigger and .... frankly a bit more, shall we say, FLASHIER.  In a gift forced upon Mr. Trump by the Royal Family of Qatar, his insecurity with regards to other World Leaders has been addressed without... shall we say mechanical interventions.  And to be clear, you are the reporter from AP [About Planes] News right?  Actually, it doesn't matter because my answer would have been pretty much the same either way..."

When asked for comments, First Lady Melania Trump would only say, "I like BIG things und I have to say Donny's thing has always been a smaller than many other World Leaders I 'meat'. HELLO JUSTIN - I be in Montreal next week and I bring da cigars! Montreal smoked meat 'BE BEST' ever!"

In related news, newly elected Canadian Prime Minster Mark Carney has acceded to American DEMANDS that he NOT meet Melania.

'AP' News Photo??

BONUS FEATURE!

World inFamous Albanian Mystic

NOT Commemorating D-Day, June 6, 1944

124 (2020-01-01)

WHN EXCLUSIVE: The Washington D.C. parade will cost between $25-45 million and will feature 28 M1 Abrams tanks (70 tons each); 28 Stryker armored personnel carriers; more than 100 'other' vehicles; 6,700 marching soldiers; 50 helicopter' 34 horses; 2 mules; and a dog [EDITOR: "Bad boy Cooper..."].  But the highlight of the parade will be a SOLID GOLD BUST OF DONALD TRUMP (see photo above) sponsored by the WHN.... which will be 'grifted' to the Trump presidential Library in early 2029. The parade costs DO NOT include the repairs (estimated $16 Million bringing the total cost of the President's Birthday Parade to potentially $61 million) to Washington D.C. streets that will be necessary due to the 70 ton tanks destroying the pavement.  © 2025 Ned Ander-Thal, World Headline News.

COMING THIS

JUNE 14!

SPEAKING OF BIGLY THINGS

COMING THIS JUNE 14, 2025!

THE BIGGEST, MOST SPECTACULAR

MILITARY PARADE EVER TO BE HELD TO

CELEBRATE HIS ROYAL HIGHNESS

DONALD TRUMP'S [EGO?] 79th BIRTHDAY

oh, and the 250th Birthday of the US Army.

CAUTION: GOLD and BRIGHT LIGHTS May

Cause Temporary Blindness!